Alynwa's Mind: It's Crazy in There

My Mom passed away peacefully in her sleep this morning at 2:57AM, Pacific time.  I was there with her when she died.  Rather than mourn her death, I choose to celebrate her life and our relationship.

My mother was 88 years old and of sound mind.  She was placed in ICU yesterday after a week and a half in the hospital.  Her kidneys were failing quickly and the doctor prescribed dialysis 3X a week.  She refused it.  I asked her if she was aware that decision was life-ending.  Her answer?  "I asked the doctor what kind of quality of life would I have and he told me very poor.  So yes, I know what I'm doing."  I turned to the nurses and said "I agree with my mom."

When I saw that doctor later, he told me that he also agreed with her decision and that if she were his mother, he would feel the same.  "The dialysis wouldn't prolong her life," he said, "it would only prolong her death."  So I knew I had made the right decision not to question her.

I'm okay for now.  I'll be staying out here through the winter, so I have time to handle business without feeling rushed or stressed.

My Mom and stepfather prepaid for their services years ago and left me a set of instructions to follow.  She was quite organized.  Thank God.

I know she is in Heaven, at peace and free from illness and pain.

Your thoughts and prayers are much appreciated.